My Newest Adventure

Over the last month, I have started something new to me. What is it you ask? Here's the uphill climb...

Last fall, a friend asked me why, as a local food advocate, I did not have a garden to grow my own food. I didn't even have to think about it before answering. In the past, I have not had a great rapport with living things. I mean I can keep most house plants alive, but lush they are not. I have carefully avoided the common problem of overwatering by ignoring them until they droop or leaves start to turn brown. They would gladly go to another house if they had a chance. So the idea of growing my own food seemed almost comical.

The funny thing is that I make my own yogurt, bread, mozzarella cheese, and almost other kind of food we enjoy. I can sew (thanks Mom!), knit, crochet, sing, and do all sorts of other things. Why not grow some food? I talked with a farming friend; she said I could certainly grow a cherry tomato plant or two. She even volunteered to give me the plants, compost, and advice. That offer helped a lot. So I thought about the cost of various locally grown foods and decided to try the most expensive ones that were also easy to grow. Strawberries and cherry tomatoes here we go!

The more I thought about it, the more I read. The more I read, the more I realized I know a lot of gardening info already. I have a great resource book that I bought when we moved into this house in 2000. I am a Mother Earth News subscriber. I have several friends who farm for a living and several more friends who have home gardens. I am home a lot and have two sometimes willing helpers. So I thought I could handle more than 4 plants.

When it seemed like spring had sprung, I went and bought 5 everbearing strawberry plants from a local nursery (Heaven's Garden). I posted to freecycle for empty plastic cat litter buckets to serve as plant containers. I heard from a friend who offered me all her strawberry plants from last year. Alright!

Then I thought of how fabulous blueberries would be to have at home. I went and bought 4 blueberry plants (2 varieties for cross fertilization) and the leaf compost to help turn our dirt into soil. I got them into the ground and knew I needed to get them mulched soon. I was avoiding purchasing bagged mulch because of the waste of the plastic bags.

Then the Universe Provided for me.

I called my organic farming friend and shared my progress so far. That same day she sent over seedlings ready for transplant. She gave me the following seedlings: 2 cherry tomatoes, 2 heirloom tomatoes, 2 hybrid tomatoes, 2 parsley, 4 lacinato kale, and 15 lettuces. What a sweet friend! I had thought I would go with containers for all the plants because I did not want to fight the deer and rabbits for the food.

The same day a wonderful woman from Australia came to couchsurf with us. Sally is really into permaculture. She stayed with us for nearly a week and really held my hand (and trowel!) while these new transplants began their life at my house. She helped me plant, planted for me, and willingly shared lots of advice and information. Next thing I know, we are talking about the best places for more garden, borrowing a friend's pickup truck, and bringing home 1 bed full of horse manure from the farm my neighbor's kids go to ride and 3 beds full of free mulch from the county for our trees and flower beds. Now I have a whole bed around the blueberry bushes which is busy making great soil and a whole head full of ideas to keep me going! Wow Sally, Thanks so much for your physical and mental support for this new adventure!

Local Food For New Friends

Last night we acted as couchsurfing hosts for the first time. It was really fun. We hosted a family of four traveling from Florida to their home in Ottawa, Canada. They stayed just one night, but we all enjoyed each others' company - adults and kids alike. They were due to arrive after dinner, but we wanted to have a nice local dish for them to enjoy when they arrived. So we made our local dinner for us and then made dessert to share with our guests.

Dinner was pasta (not local), homemade tomato sauce which I canned from our 15 mile tomatoes and herbs, and separate local (10 mile) pork sausage. Simple but yummy. Dessert was homemade pies. The crust was made from butter (25 mile), home ground wheat, and salt. The pie filling was butternut squash (15 mile), local milk (15 mile), local eggs (5 mile), and spices from lots of places.

Being away for the holidays was really difficult on the local food front. We were guests in my mother-in-law's home and she really enjoys entertaining. That includes cooking for us - in her own style. So I had nothing to really post for my Dark Days Challenge ...

The Universe Has Provided

Anne over at Shine With Unschooling always talks about how everything is As It Should Be and how the Universe Provides for us all. I often wonder what takes the darned Universe so long sometimes. But this week, All Is Well. Our biggest issue by far is friends. We are a smidge more liberal and free with our thoughts and kids than many other homeschoolers who are geographically close to us. Ok, more than a smidge. Maybe a Grand Canyon separates us sometimes. So this causes problems making and keeping friends. I can go online and have many of my needs met. My couple of In Real Life friends are so busy and sometimes I can't just wait for them to have time for me. But Son - wow now that is another story completely. He craves social company. He needs it. And right now, he really wants similar age guys to hang with. He is 10. Its only going to become a more important issue is what I figure. And very soon it will involve the opposite sex as well.

How did the Universe provide, you ask? We have known this one family since Son was 1.5 years old. There is a same age boy as Son, a fabulous Friend Mom and interesting Dad, a fun daughter who passes down many clothes to my Daughter, and a younger person as well. Friend Mom and I have maintained our friendship through the Pink Shirt incident (teasing about boys wearing pink), kids avoiding each other, disinterest, and many years. Friend Mom came over to our house monday to hang out with Son and Daughter while I went on a date with my husband. First one without kids since we had kids! Wouldn't you know it but Friend Mom's son (M) and daughter (A) came with her to play. All kids and adults had a fabulous time that night. M asked when he could come back. Tuesday of course! M came over yesterday for about 3.5 hrs and again Son and M had a great time. Today Son gets to see his cool friend C which is super cool because we had to go more than a week without seeing C and his family due to illness.

Happy Thanksgiving! We have a lot to be Thankful for!

Being Nice

Why is it so hard for some people to be nice? I mean they look fine. They use the English language well enough. But something happens when my name is mentioned. It is like they are hypnotized or something. They start spouting the meanest things. I have not had so many people bad mouth me since I was in high school! Am I just surrounded by a bunch of people that never grew up? The funny thing is, I have heard these types of stories from several people in the last few weeks. One of my (oh so lucky) friends will be talking with someone they either just met or know casually. My name is mentioned in the context of "My friend ZZZ blah blah" and they ask my friend to repeat. As if they couldn't believe what they heard. A friend of ZZZ's? And then this person will start saying how I am a this and a that and do A and allow my kids to do B. If they are particularly polite they will mention something along the lines of saint-like qualities my friend must have for putting up with me. I mean whoa! Who asked you?! After thinking about it for a while, I came up with one characteristic to define these people - closed minded. They are simply not open to anyone or anything who does things differently from themselves. I feel sad for them - really. They are missing out on so many things and on the spice of life. Variety is where its at.

Yes, I know I am far from mainstream in so many ways. I like it that way. Yes, I know that I am "super smart" (the PhD in physics tells folks that I have an academic streak in me) and know a bit about lots of things. To many people I am simply scary. I speak my mind although I try to limit it to when asked. I got a lot better at that after becoming a LLL Leader. And thats one part that kills me. Even people whom I have helped breastfeed their babies think it is ok to speak impolitely about me to a stranger. I mean, do they really think I won't find out? How silly! I have lived in this area for oh my gosh 17 years (except for those 2 in Chicago). I know a lot of people and for good or bad, a lot of people know me. Or rather they know who I am but they don't know the real me. If they did, they would consider me a valuable friend. One who encourages them to stretch beyond their comfort zone in almost every way. Too bad for them though!

Bellydancing - my new passion!

Yesterday I had a great time going to my first bellydancing workshop. I went to the House of Dance for a Choreography Workshop with Amy Koskey. We moved, we shaked, and had a grand old time. Amy dances a tribal fusions tyle which was so much fun. I learned that someone I have known for over 6 years teaches bellydance in the next county over and dances with the area bellydance troupe. Wow that was a surprise. I checked out her photos on the web and no wonder I never knew. She looks so different decked out in bellydancing attire than when I see her at the nature center where she works:-)

I know what you are thinking. Why bellydance? Why now? Well, at Live and Learn, Mindy and her son Max did this fusion bellydance/hip hop act which made me want to be on stage dancing with them. Since I came home from L&L thinking that the things I spend my days doing were kind of boring - I was feeling open to new passions. I got advice to just try a bunch of new things and see what I liked. I tried bellydance. I like!

On the way to the workshop, I stopped to pick up some wood burning tools that I got through freecycle. My Roots and Shoots group is going to make some trail signs for a local state park. The funny thing was that the place I picked up these tools was the same neighborhood as my friend Ronda used to live in. The same Ronda that started the Roots and Shoots group and then handed it over to me several months later! We sure miss you dear:-)

I am checking out an actual bellydance class this weekend. I hope that is as fun as the workshop I did yeaterday.

Where oh where is my Tribe?

This month's blog carnival is about unschooling tribes. I am not sure how many people count as a tribe. I have tribe components. People that my family and I love to be with, enjoy doing things with, and don't think we are totally wacko. People that see us Shine. Unfortunately, these wonderful people are spread out (from 10 minutes away to North Carolina - soon to be Washington State) so http://www.blogger.com/img/gl.link.gifI have not seen more than one family at a time. Also, many of my tribe components are too busy to see us more than every few weeks which feels very untribe-like. I crave more. More people. More getting together. More fun. More tribe.

So what am I doing about that? Well, surrounding ourselves with mainstream people or mainstream homeschoolers is not an option. They really think we are off the deep end. I have actually been told from some of these people that they do not want their kids around mine. Reason being seems to be totally their problem: my kids are allowed to do things their kids are not and they don't want to explain the whys of that to their kids. Just wait till their kids are teenagers!

So connecting with unschoolers is my goal then. Here's my plan:

(1) I took my family to the Live and Learn Conference. Now I have a tribe member in my own home - Dear Husband :-) And we met tons of cool people from all over the country. I really hope to be ablet o visit some of these folks or host them at our place in the future.

(2) I organize Unschooler Hangouts in the DC/Baltimore metro area. I tell people on SMHN, marylandorganiclearning, and MidAtlanticRadicalUnschoolers email lists about the Hangouts. We have met several new families this way. Getting together the second time seems to be harder...

(3) I am trying to cultivate the relationships I already have. Daughter has one friend who attends school and I am working hard to maintain this relationship for her. I am trying to stay connected with my friends even when our kids do not enjoy each others company. Son is the hardest one since not many local people can see what a fabulous, shiny, person he is.

(4) I have a large virtual tribe at the Radical Unschoolers Network which is really cool and really makes me feel good.

I have tons of ideas of cool things to do with a tribe, but I still need that physical, local tribe in order to take my ideas and make them flourish.

Hanging out with Unschoolers

A few days ago we went and hung out at the National Colonial Farm with some other unschoolers (Jane and Bethani). It was a fabulous time - just like last time we were with Jane at Fort Washington. Every other week or so we get together someplace with lots of space and interesting things to do, play, wander around the place, talk, and just be. We call these days Unschooler Hangouts.

This time, my friend Jane tells me "Around other unschoolers, I'm radical. I had no idea I was so left!". I have only known her since January, but she always seemed pretty radical to me. That is one reason why we connected so well. She sees the beauty and shine in my children that few others seem to see. Jane is A OK in my book to be as left as she wants!

The girls had a great time together - even after there was chasing, tripping, both girls falling to the dusty road, and making up. Here they are just after saying goodbye to the pig.



We were in awe of each other at the end of the day. I was totally impressed with her calm state and way of handling when her son Nik was just not there when she turned around. He had gone to see the pigs, had not heard that we were changing plans to see the horses, and so we proceeded unknowingly without him. She did not worry about his location, only how she would reconnect with him. When they did find each other, he was sad to have realized he was alone. She did not berate him, or chide him for being in a different place from everyone else. Later she told me story of how she came to know when Nik just needed his own space. Fantastic!

She was impressed with my ability to help Son work through his hunger, need for a snack, desire to go home before his sister was ready. I tend to do better in front of an audience :-) Jane's son Christopher helped Son as well. For him it was as easy as walking up to him and walking away talking with him.

All in all, we decided it was way more fun to hang out with other radical unschoolers that others. We don't feel judged, or like some parent is waiting for us to reign in our kids when they are just doing what makes them happy. Did we stop the kids from throwing stuff at the turkeys? You bet. Did we let the kids throw rocks into the river from the shore? You bet. Did we all have a fabulous time? You bet. Even though it was her first time with us ever - Bethani agrees!

Live and Learn - Wow!

Ok, so I haven't managed to write every day or even every other. But that's ok. I am relieving myself of that duty.

So we got back a few days ago from the Live and Learn Conference near Asheville, NC. It was fantastic for so many reasons. First of all, Son connected with a friend on the first day and we rarely saw him for the rest of the conference. He played, partied, and had a great time. He sometimes had a hard time getting food he wanted at the cafeteria, but he neglected to mention that until the last day. He also stayed in said friend's room one night. That was his first night away from us - a milestone. His new friend Pavi thought Son was great as did Pavi's parents (I had never met a stay at home unschooling dad before - how cool!).

Second of all, Husband attended talks and watched the people around him and has come home Changed (in my observation). He is much more committed to unschooling. Maybe it was seeing how happy and terrific Son can be when he truly getting his needs AND wants met. Maybe it was Beth's sparkly talk on Peaceful Partnerships. Maybe it was seeing all those grown and almost grown unschoolers in real life and seeing how confident, well-spoken, and darned interesting they are. Whatever it was about the conference, I am thankful:-)

Daughter, Son, and Husband challenged themselves with the climbing tower and the giant swing. Wow, they were impressive - especially Daughter since she is only 5. The swing was so high!

We stayed with 2 families on our way to the conference - found via couchsurfing.com - my new favorite way to stay. You get to meet cool people, hang out with them in their home environment, stay overnight, then return the favor by hosting someone in your home at another time.

On our trip to NC, we rented a small sailboat and the kids sailed for the first time. That was pretty cool. We hiked around in Stone Mountain park (the most memorable - I mean infamous - vacation destination from my youth). Oh, we had a great time. I instilled a desire to travel more. We are planning already!

My First Sleepover

Yesterday I pulled out my circular saw to make shelves for a pantry cabinet in the basement (need somewhere to store all those canning jars full of yummy local food that I make!). Daughter and I went to Lowe's and get wood - but it was FSC certified hardwood plywood. We cut it to size with just one cut each piece. We soaped up the pegs to hold up the shelves and voila there we go. A pantry. Now I just need to go back and get more of the peg things now that I know they are the right size. I only have one shelf in my 3 shelf cabinet.

After that, I dropped Daughter off at her friend L's house (for the first time without me there) and headed off to my beloved yoga class. It was so nice to be there and it turned out to be a fabulous private class. Yeah for me! When I picked up Daughter, L came with us for our first sleepover. I don't remember sleeping over at a friend's house except maybe once when I was growing up so it all felt new to me. Since they had already had a few hours to play together, Daughter and L were getting along great when we got home. But they were getting tired already. We played restaurant (so they could have a snack), set up our city rugs and little cars to play, and got out some books for when we got tired. They were both so tired but unwilling to go to sleep early. I finally put on my nightgown, announced I was reading 2 books aloud and turning off the lights of my room. They each had a room they could go play in if they wanted. They opted to stay with me and lights out. I didn't take long for them to fall asleep. L had a bit of a hard time because Zelda the Cat was purring loudly. I got up at my normal time and hopped with into the shower. I was surprised to come out of the shower to Daughter dressed and ready to play with the sleeping L. Waiting is so hard sometimes. Zelda the Cat woke L up with her meowing for brushing to the wait wasn't too long. Getting started in the morning was a challenge with the two girls. I called L's mom and asked her to stop by and see if L was ready to go home. Once I got enough fuel into them, things were much better. L was not ready to go, so now they are in the basement being noisy and active and having a grand old time. I think it was a success!

Beach and Bike

Well, remember that go-kart part replacement from last time? The part worked just fine. After another spin in the go-kart, DS decided that it was really not what he wanted. It jiggled his body around too much, he couldn't start it himself (pull start from the back with driver pushing gas pedal down), and who knows what other reasons. So now, he wants to sell it. Hmm.

Yesterday we went to pick blackberries at a new farm with friends that we see rarely (but the Dads are officemates). Monsieur Louis' farm to be exact - in VA. Blackberries for $1/lb that are fabulous. Monsieur Louis apparently came to the US from France to be the Queen's master gardener somewhere and then never left. He has all sorts of yummies and beautiful flowers. We then went to Colonial Beach to play in the water. It was so nice to sit with a friend, have good conversation, and have all 5 kids be happily playing with each other. We decided that we really did not live too far to see each other more often. We made a pledge to see each other every other week or more. We can't wait. Our ice cream on the way home was yummy and refreshing.

Today, we got everyone up, left the house at 8, and went on a 15 mile bike ride with our bike club (Oxon Hill Bike Club). It was at a member's horse farm with a family picnic afterwards. We exercised, saw the countryside, ate with friends, petted horses, jump started my car (boy did that take a long time - it was totally out of juice from leaving my XM radio plugged intot he power outlet and the headlights on!), and headed home in the middle of the afternoon.

The rest of the day was spent resting, eating, and packing so that DH and DS can leave in the am for cub scout camp. They will be gone Sun-Sat. Yeah for them and yeah for DD and I :-)