Being Nice

Why is it so hard for some people to be nice? I mean they look fine. They use the English language well enough. But something happens when my name is mentioned. It is like they are hypnotized or something. They start spouting the meanest things. I have not had so many people bad mouth me since I was in high school! Am I just surrounded by a bunch of people that never grew up? The funny thing is, I have heard these types of stories from several people in the last few weeks. One of my (oh so lucky) friends will be talking with someone they either just met or know casually. My name is mentioned in the context of "My friend ZZZ blah blah" and they ask my friend to repeat. As if they couldn't believe what they heard. A friend of ZZZ's? And then this person will start saying how I am a this and a that and do A and allow my kids to do B. If they are particularly polite they will mention something along the lines of saint-like qualities my friend must have for putting up with me. I mean whoa! Who asked you?! After thinking about it for a while, I came up with one characteristic to define these people - closed minded. They are simply not open to anyone or anything who does things differently from themselves. I feel sad for them - really. They are missing out on so many things and on the spice of life. Variety is where its at.

Yes, I know I am far from mainstream in so many ways. I like it that way. Yes, I know that I am "super smart" (the PhD in physics tells folks that I have an academic streak in me) and know a bit about lots of things. To many people I am simply scary. I speak my mind although I try to limit it to when asked. I got a lot better at that after becoming a LLL Leader. And thats one part that kills me. Even people whom I have helped breastfeed their babies think it is ok to speak impolitely about me to a stranger. I mean, do they really think I won't find out? How silly! I have lived in this area for oh my gosh 17 years (except for those 2 in Chicago). I know a lot of people and for good or bad, a lot of people know me. Or rather they know who I am but they don't know the real me. If they did, they would consider me a valuable friend. One who encourages them to stretch beyond their comfort zone in almost every way. Too bad for them though!